


Magna Carta

by Static Insanity



Category: iCarly
Genre: Humor, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2010-05-08
Updated: 2010-05-12
Packaged: 2014-01-04 15:04:19
Rating: T
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,088
Publisher: www.fanfiction.net
Story URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/5954811/1/
Author URL: https://www.fanfiction.net/u/1585357/Static-Insanity
Summary: A sudden arrival of a new guidance councilor took Sam and Freddie's less than civilized relationship into a whirlwind of mischief, revealed secrets and unexpected bonding time.





	1. A Day Gone Wrong

**A/N**: And I'm back with a new Seddie Story. So I was watching The Breakfast Club when something just hit me, and bam! New Seddie plot bunny, but it's not really like TBC. The movie just inspired me to write another love/hate relationship between this two, because I miss them!

**Disclaimer: **I just do not own them. Yeah, that's the sad reality of things.

**Warning:** Swearing. lol. Just because Freddie can. ;)

* * *

**A Day Gone Wrong**

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***

"What a gorgeous day it is, isn't it Freddope?" Sam said in a fake sing-song voice as she strode over her locker with Carly. Freddie grimaced as he crossed his arms over his chest then muttered something that neither the curly blonde nor the brunette could comprehend. Ah, typical day.

"What is up?" Carly crooned lazily as she faced her friends. They were distancing themselves away from each other than usual. She didn't know what's happening but she swore the growing tension was so thick it could pass as Gibby's second layer of fat. Freddie shot an accusatory look at Sam, who was getting her lunch out of her locker.

"This animal," he said as loudly as possible, pointing his finger towards Sam's direction. She was barely listening, "Dipped my new pearpad in Spencer's tub of milk!"

"Oh." That was all Carly could give as she placed her hands on both sides of her hips, shaking her head.

"Well, it's not my fault you're too slow in catching me," Sam suddenly said, turning to face her friends. There was a jerky dangling on the corner of her mouth. "Besides, you could buy another one for me to dip into the salsa next time."

"Shut up!" He bellowed. _Wow, his anger was going into a whole new level_. "I worked hard for that money last summer, Sam. So don't give me that crap because my mom will not buy me another one."

"Awww, that's swell! So is mommy teaching ickle Freddie how to act like a man? "she said, clasping her fingers together to signify a mocked admiration. Carly looked alarmed when she saw his fist curling into a ball.

"Hey guys, stop," she said breathlessly, as if someone was running after her. "Please, Sam. Don't do that again. Let's understand him…apologize---"

"Sorry Carls, but the word 'apologize' just doesn't come free with my dictionary. I don't really care."

"What?"

"Did I stutter, Carly? I don't think so. See you later," Sam said, raising her eyebrows as she led the way towards the cafeteria, leaving Carly and Freddie a few steps behind. When she was out of earshot, Freddie held his hands up in the air in frustration.

"This is insane. She's insane. Can you believe it?" he asked crossly, stomping his foot so hard that it almost hit Carly's.

"I'm sorry, Freddie. I should have been there, you know. I could have stopped her," she said, exasperatingly. Then she began shaking her shoulders violently as she paced in the hallway, like she always do every time she was in panic. "Pearpad's so expensive…oh my god, the money…"

"Hey, hey Carly, it's not your fault, "he said reassuringly, trying to follow her. "It's hers. She'll have to pay for this."

"What kind of 'pay' are you talking about, Freddie?" She suddenly stopped, his voice bringing her out of her paranoia. "Like 'I'm going to let her steal money to buy me a new pearpad' or 'I'm going to play bad-ass and pull a prank on her like I'd win' pay?"

"Well, the first one will make me look like a Mafia boss and I might end in jail with her," he said slowly, brushing his chin in deep thought. "But I think the latter will do…"

"Oh no, I'm not giving you the idea!"

"You just did, Ms. Carly Shay," he said, a smile was playing on his lips. Carly didn't want this to happen; she didn't like the familiar air in his voice. "And now we'll going to have a plan."

"_We?_ I'm staying out of this. You know what happens when you have a go with Sam…it's like a stinking death wish," she said, backing off when he stepped forward to voice his 'plan'. He groaned. "Sorry for crushing your dreams, Freddie."

"Fine, I'm going to do this all by myself. _Thanks for the concern, Carly_."

"Hey, it's not me you are angry with!"

"I'm sorry! I just lost 700 bucks because of that girl. That's pretty big for me."

"I know, but can't you just have someone to repair it?" Carly asked, biting her lip. She knew she was grasping an impossible straw right there.

"Nah, it's soaked inside and out. I tried to go to Mr. Hubbles to get it fixed, but it's pretty hopeless," he sighed as he started to walk towards the cafeteria. "God, I can't stand seeing her while I'm eating."

Freddie and Carly arrived in the crowded cafeteria. They automatically lingered their eyes towards the throng and saw nothing but occupied tables. Freddie looked at the farthest corner of the room to see the only available table…and there's Sam pigging herself out. He felt like this is not one of the better days of his teenage life.

"Come on, you have no choice," Carly said as she took his hand and dragged Freddie towards Sam.

"Oh hey," she said nonchalantly, her eyes darting towards Carly's hand clasped with his. "So did you just…hook up in the Janitor's closet?"

"That's not funny, Sam," Carly said, raising her eyebrows. There's something wrong in the way Sam talks today, as if she was raging in everyone by coating it with her crude sense of humor. Freddie wondered if Sam ate stale eggs this morning. "Not funny at all."

"Come on now, I'm just kidding!" She said, shaking her head. She began to laugh too, leaving Carly perplexed and rather annoyed.

"What is wrong with you?" Freddie asked, contempt was evident in his voice. Sam's shoulders stiffened when she heard his voice. It was almost cracking, uneven. But she maintained her composure and leaned forward, smirking at him.

"Nothing. _Nothing at all_."

"You're a bitch."

Sam's eyes widened at his response. That was the first time Freddie swore squarely in her face. Carly was suddenly alarmed.

"Freddie---"

"What did you say, Benson?"

"Did I stutter, Puckett? You are a bitch for pushing others around to hide your problems."

"You---"

Then a blow echoed across the room, catching everyone's attention. Carly stood abruptly to catch hold of Sam, who was trying hard to make her way to the other side of the table and punch Freddie again. The jeering cries of the students around them felt like acid in her ears.

"Please Sam, stop!"

"For you, then," she said as she stopped struggling against Carly's hold. After she released her from her restraining arms, Sam stood up and gathered her things, looking at Freddie with pure disgust in her eyes just before she walked away. The crowd parted in two as she stomped her way out of the cafeteria, looking shocked and intrigued from what they had witnessed. Freddie slumped on his seat and scratched his head furiously, feeling frustrated than ever.

"What did you just do?" Carly said in disbelief.

"I----don't know. I'll just go…" his voice trailed off as he stood and walked away from her. After a few rambled thoughts, Carly decided to follow him, ignoring the whispers of confusion between the students around her.

Feeling irritated by Sam's abrasiveness and Freddie's tactlessness, Carly fumed as she walked towards her locker to sort the things she needed for Chemistry class.

"Those bickering pigeons…" she muttered irritably, but her silent fuming was cut short when an unfamiliar woman appeared beside her, looking like the sun shone out of her butt. She hated when others are positively happy when she wasn't.

"I reckon you are Carly Shay?" The tall woman with horn-rimmed glasses asked.

"Yes ma'am, do you happen to be looking for your…um…son or daughter?" she asked as she shifted her books on her arms uncomfortably, cradling them with such care. The tall woman smiled at her.

"No, no," she said, chuckling. "As a matter of fact, I am your new guidance councilor. Ms. Brown."

"I see." Carly's voice cracked at the sound of 'guidance councilor'. "Did I get myself in trouble?"

"No of course." She laughed once again. "I just wanted to know the names of your friends who happened to be quarreling a while ago."

"Sam Puckett and Freddie Benson, Ma'm."

"I see, thank you for that bit of information!" But Carly interrupted her before she walked away.

"I'm sorry for what they did a while ago, Ms. Brown. I hope you don't suggest Principal Franklin to expel them right away…" she was spazzing, but Ms. Brown just laughed. God, she hated when people laughed at her.

"I'm not going to, silly! I'm just designing this new program of mine that might repair these barbaric relationships of the people around here into a more civilized one. I hope you'll not mention this to your friends, Ms. Shay."

"You can count on that, ma'am," Carly said, a smile was slowly forming on her lips. _Smells like a plan. _

_

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_

**A/N: HMMMMMMM. Dun, Dun, Dun. I'm excited for what will happen next. Ha, so read and review. I want to know what you think. And you can also suggest other things to be thrown into the story. Reviews always rejuvinates my muse. Cheers!  
**


	2. Ridgeway Gets Engaged

**Second chapter is up!**

disclaimer: I just do not own them, okay? LOL.

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**Ridgeway gets engaged  
**

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"That Freddie is such a pain in the ass," she muttered over and over as she lazily made her way to her first class, English. Sam still couldn't get over what transpired yesterday in the cafeteria. "Bitch, eh? Pfffft."

Feeling sinister and offended at the same time, she pushed the door of the room violently open that the sound of it sent an unwavering attention from the students inside. She held her head high, raising her eyebrows to cover the fact that she was unsure of her current sitting place. Sam's eyes roamed around and her face fell; the only available seat was beside Freddie.

"Stop staring at the man," she said threateningly at them, ignoring their knowing looks. She turned towards Gibby, who was sitting nearest her. "Give me your seat!"

"But----"

"No more excuses, Gibwad. I'm sitting here," she said hastily as she dragged him out of his chair. Gibby grunted as he made his way beside Freddy, who resorted in giving the poor boy an apologetic frown. He pondered about Sam's next-level violence absently.

Well, this fact wasn't ignored by Freddie Benson. Usually, Sam will just try to scare the daylights out of him by dipping the edge of the pearpad centimeters from the bovine byproduct, but that wasn't the case yesterday morning, before they all headed to school. He was standing there, smirking as he tried his best in waiting for her to return the pearpad defeated and all. But everything went quite a turn when he saw Sam unceremoniously dumped the thing in Spencer's tub-o-milk, which he uses to wash his face every night.

"_That was a real splash," she said, her eyes looking from Freddie and to the tub in intervals. "Splash…you get it? That was funny."_

"_Please tell me you didn't do it, Sam." His eyes were tightly shut, missing the wide grin spreading in Sam's face._

"_As much as I wanted to lie…but I did it. Oopsy-daisy."_

The rest was history. Freddie bit his lip bitterly as his thoughts drifted to the wasted 700 bucks he earned for assisting his mom in her nursing duties. It was something he kept from Sam's prying nose because even he thought it was kind of embarrassing. Anyway, that PearPad's too important, too expensive, and too memorable. It was the first thing he bought with his own money that he earned after sacrificing half of his remaining dignity. Then, suddenly, he felt a jab on his shoulder; it was Carly.

"And now Freddie's back on earth," she sighed as she pointed her finger towards Ms. Elbert, their English teacher. Freddie always thought she looked like his old and dying aunt. Sam thought she looked like Jabba the Hut.

"So, erm, we're not going to discuss Macbeth today since, erm, our new guidance councilor had this, erm, new program that she likes to, uhhhh, discuss to you."

And then a tall woman with cat-like eyes emerged from the door. She had an aura of kindness in her, unlike their former guidance councilor who spoke like a soldier and punishes their students like a soldier. Well, you get the point. Everyone was relatively thankful when that old bat retired from her counseling duties.

"Good morning kids, I'm Ms. Stella Brown, your new guidance councilor. And as your new councilor, I have some new programs that I like to implement for further development and improvement of peer relationships. So I'd like you all to get a piece of paper."

Ms. Brown looked at the students keenly as they lazily fished their school bags for a piece of paper. Freddie felt a lump in his throat, just like he does when something's not going to end up good. He looked sideways to see if Carly's instincts were agreeing with his, but she was smoothing her paper and aligning her pens on the side. Ms. Brown cleared her throat to catch everyone's attention.

"So… here's what you're going to do. You're going to list some good qualities that could describe your perfect significant other---"

"Are we…goofing around like this for the whole semester?" A boy with a curly blonde hair piped in from the corner of the room.

"We're not goofing around, mister. We're going to assess your relationships with your fellow classmates. Now, jot down."

Sam's forehead crinkled with frustration as she tried to point her pen on the paper lying in front of her. _What qualities?_ She thought. _I have a lot of standards when it comes to boys but that would make me look like an up-tight high maintenance girlfriend. Sheesh._

"Aha," she said softly, scribbling rather hastily on her paper.

_**ANYTHING except Freddork Benson. **_

Freddie couldn't help but be disturbed by Sam's obnoxious laughter across the room. She sure messes with his concentration most of the time. He was, after all, half-way through his list that practically contained anything that could describe the girl beside her: raven-haired, pale, beautiful, almond-eyed, kind, hot…

"What the heck are you writing?" Carly asked, leaning forward to catch a glimpse of Freddie's paper. He suddenly jerked from his seat, crumpling his paper with a nervous laugh.

"Nothing," he said, ignoring Carly's furrowing eyebrows.

"Oh, you must have written something about Carly's butt right there. Really smooth, Benson," Sam said so loud that the other people around the room laughed along with her. Freddie gave a peeved look at her before he ripped another piece of paper from his pad.

_**ANYTHING except Sam Puckett!**_

"Okay," Ms. Brown said, tapping the table to cease the growing noise in the room. "You can pass it in front and then to the aisle. I'm going to post the result of the assessment after lunch break."

"Yes, no Chemsitry!" Everyone cheered before they gathered their bags and made their way outside the door.

* * *

The sound of the bell alerted everyone that it is time for Chemistry class. Sam felt a little smug as she strode her way to the lab, since she doesn't have to suffer through a boring discussion about metals and non-metals. She also pondered about that little assessment crap with their new guidance councilor? What's her name again? Oh well.

"I hope she'll match us for our upcoming prom," a voice said behind her. Sam looked over her shoulder to see an enthusiastic Carly. "I mean, what else is she going to do with that thing?"

"I don't know, Shay. Hope you're right. Then that'll mean that I will never be partnered with that nerd on legs."

"Guess again, Sammy," Carly said teasingly as she pushed Sam towards the room. Sam laughed in disbelief as she sat on one of the nearest chairs. _That would be extremely impossible. _

The room was noisy because of the arising curiosity and anticipation about Ms. Brown's activity; when it comes to attractions with the opposite sex, everyone would be talking.

"Quiet everyone! Pipe down…" their Chemistry teacher, Mr. Blackwell, boomed as he made his way towards the room along with the guidance councilor. Freddie felt a sudden lump in the throat when he saw the paper resting on Ms. Brown's hand.

"So let's start with a little warm up for the whole program," Ms. Brown said, and everyone went silent. "What are your plans after graduating, Ms. Carly Shay?"

Carly stood up, fumbling with her jacket as she tried to think of the things she wanted to do after college. She rarely thinks about her future for she was a firm believer that the present is the most important thing to focus on.

"I guess… be an actress, or maybe a teacher… then I'll probably get married."

"Yes that's it. It is one of the things we have to face during adulthood. Now, you may sit down Carly," she cleared her throat before she continued, "Since now that you're growing up fast, I want each and every one of you to prepare for the complex world of adulthood. It is not like high school, where you could just erase everything with your pencil eraser or correction fluid.

"Anyway, we wanted every one of you to take a rest from your academics and look at yourself. Am I responsible enough? Mature enough to face the reality of adulthood? Time passes so fast and you, students of Ridgeway, have to taste the future by practicing how to be an adult."

"Wait, Ms. Brown. Are you implying that we're going to re enact adulthood for the whole semester?" Wendy asked as her hand flew into the air.

"We're getting there, honey," Ms. Brown replied sweetly. "We're not going to have programs like business management and entrepreneurship, because that's the job that colleges do for you. We're going to have, I hope you'll be okay with this, an activity that will deal with your attitude and your relationship with other people. An activity that you'll think we'll be easy to do. But I swear, it's hard but satisfying at the same time."

"Get on with it already," Sam mumbled lazily as she squirmed around her seat. The guidance councilor heard her and smiled.

"We're going to practice Marriage and Parenting." Several students started to murmur with shock and confusion. "But don't worry; I had already picked suitable partners for each of you."

"But--- who are our partners?" Gibby asked, his eyebrows rose with curiosity. Ms. Brown nodded curtly as she taped a large piece of paper on the blackboard. Everyone stood from their seats and hastily ran in front, eager to acknowledge their partners for the year. Sam tried to break in the crowd to get a good look, but the throng was too busy chattering about their said partners.

"Such losers, who's yours Carly?" she suddenly asked as she caught sight of her brunette friend. Carly was relatively happy.

"Simon's my partner," she said breathlessly, "I think he's okay. He has a nice pair of eyes."

"Luck you," Sam said smirking as she punched her in on the shoulders lightly. "Have you seen mine---"

"No ---effing--- way."

Sam and Carly turned their heads to see a shocked Freddie standing inches away from the crowd. His eyes were staring towards the cold floor of the room.

"Wow Dorkpants, I've never seen you so… shocked. Who's the baby mommy? Gibby, isn't it?"

But Carly started to squeal and suppressed a giggle behind her mouth. She started looking from Sam to Freddie in intervals.

"What?"

The only thing that she could comprehend amongst the deafening noise of the room was You… Freddie… married… and whipped. She shot a glare towards her best friend.

"Stop joking----"

"Hey, Sam and Freddie are partners. Looks like you owe me hundred bucks, Gibby!" Wendy said from behind as held her hand. Sam felt her heart thump louder against her chest.

"This couldn't be happening," she said, shaking her head in disbelief. "I'm being punk'd. Tell me I'm being Punk'd, Carly!"

"I thought that show doesn't exist anymore?"

"Ugh. You're not helping! This isn't happening. This is a joke," Freddie said frantically as he paced around his two friends.

"I hate to say it but you're right, Benson," she said as he grabbed his hand and dragged him towards the guidance office. And there they saw Ms. Brown happily arranging paper works on her desk.

"Ms. Brown, I have a big problem."

"What's it, Ms. Puckett?"

"There seems to be, ah, an error in the list."

"You mean the marriage list? How do you say so?"

"This thing," she pointed to Freddie's direction, "Would never ever be my husband."

"But this is just a mock marriage that will improve your---"

"I know that, Ms. Brown. But it is impossible!"

"Yes, we're just too opposite," Freddie tried to explain as calmly as possible, but the guidance councilor just chuckled, leaving the both of them dumbfounded and annoyed at the same time. "Besides, I don't think it's safe for any breathing male to have this rabid woman as their wife."

"Shut up!"

"That's why I decided to match the two of you together, so that you could work in improving your relationship with eachother."

Sam felt a bad taste in her mouth as the word 'relationship' struck a chord in her brain.

"But I wrote ANYTHING EXCEPT FREDDIE in my paper, isn't that enough for a hint, Ms Brown?"

"Suicidal, I tell you."

"Hey, don't be so hard on each other," the guidance councilor smiled at them. "Come on, I'm the boss here. I already made up my mind. No more excuses."

"So you're, like, forcing us to be civil with each other?" Freddie questioned, his arms crossed.

"Exactly," Ms. Brown said as she pushed them out of the office with her gentle hands. "Now, if you don't have any questions, you could proceed to your next class. Tomorrow, we'll be starting our first activity."

As they left the room, Sam immediately banged her head on the nearest wall.

"Watch out, Puckett. Your head might lose more screws than it already had," he said sardonically as he watched her.

"Since when did you learn how to be cheeky on me?"

"Since you started being cheeky on me? Come on, Sam. You're a good teacher."

"I hate you Benson."

"Well, I hate you too," he said, raising his eyebrows when Sam started to walk away from him, her feet stomping along the way. "Still can't believe this is happening. I mean, how could I marry you?"

"How could I marry a dork like you? You're not even in my standards. This is pure bull."

"Hey, stop calling me a dork."

"Sorry then, dork," she said, a sly smile was forming on her lips.

* * *

**A/N: I still find it funny how things will work if Sam and Freddie will be married. You know, being all oppsites and such? But it's nice if they'll have some cute little abrasive nerds. **

Review please! ;)


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